Tag Archives: Sex

Realizations on Writing

I teased this a couple of posts ago, and I suppose its time to pay it off.  I’m not getting any sleep tonight either with a pack of teenage hooligans roaming the neighborhood on foot for since 1:30am

So long story short, I’ve spent my down time trying to figure out why I was feeling so frustrated, (and thus burnt out) with my writing before my long break.  I came to a couple of conclusions:  I wasn’t writing for me, I was overly concerned about offending people, and I’m still trying to find my exact niche on writing.

The not writing for me thing is ironic, since during my time on twitter, I was constantly encouraging people and telling them that if THEY don’t enjoy what they’re writing, it will show through in their writing and it won’t be their best work.  I’ve studied public speaking and communication, and let myself get too wrapped up in the admonitions to tailor your communication to your audience.  That’s fine if you have a specific audience you’re reaching out to.  When you’re trying to write something that will appeal to wider demographics though, you have to set those admonitions aside to a degree and be true to yourself.  Otherwise your writing or words won’t be genuine.  People pick up on that too, at least on a subconscious level.

Twitter was a horrible experience for me in terms of creating that worry about offending people.  Despite all the talk about how great the writing community is, I saw alot of clique behavior.  Erotica authors aren’t real writers.  If you do this in your erotica (such as mentioning bra sizes), you’re a crappy writer and I won’t read you, etc…

The main gaggle of female erotica authors would even ghost you if you didn’t support their beliefs that women shouldn’t be held to any conduct, dress, etc… standards and similar extreme SJW ideas.  heaven help you if you supported a male erotica author also.  Kind of sad really.

I could (and maybe will do) a whole separate post on my thoughts there.  It does impact my writing after all.  LONG story short however, suffice it to say I do believe in women’s sexual empowerment, but I also believe in common sense limits on everything.  Wear a short, tight dress and flaunt what you’ve got for example.  Just don’t get mad if you’re dressing sexy and guys (or other women) flirt with you or check you out.  You have EVERY right to be completely safe dressed like that.  No should always mean no as well.  How you dress does nothing to change that.  Getting bitchy when you get harmless attention when you’re dressing to get attention is immature at best though.

As much as I love sex and sensuality, I also believe some things belong behind closed doors.  That’s another thing that seems to set me apart at least from some of the younger erotica authors.  I’m libertarian enough to believe anything kinky you want to do behind closed doors is fine.  Common decency and general self respect dictate some things should stay private, not flaunted in public though.  Bottom line, I’ve learned to stop caring what the twitter crowd thinks.  Shame since Twitter could be a good marketing tool.

Then there’s the whole finding my niche thing.  My Witchfire stories have been an attempt to see if I could combine superheroes and erotica in a real way.  The trouble with that specific genre is that the internet is loaded with sites catering to pubescent boys and outright misogynists, that glorify raping superheroines and “putting them in their place”.   They completely dehumanize woman, and mock strong, capable women.  That’s the last thing I want to contribute to.

At the same time, you have women fighting the worst elements of humanity in these stories, so there’s a question realism with never having it happen.  My original thinking was to keep it rare, not glorify it, and also have the heroine(s) escape / turn the tables, or at least get back at their attackers later.  Avoiding it entirely would be easy if I was only writing a sexy story.  I have been trying to spin a real, ongoing story between the sex scenes though.  Intrigue, personality conflicts, human problems, etc…

Part of the problem with Witchfire was that I was rushing the content also.  I think it made the story chapters far more sloppy than they should have been, and took a few aspects of the stories in directions I didn’t intend to go also.  If I pick up work there again, I’m likely to start over from scratch and treat the existing content thus far as rough drafts.

I admit, I’ve also felt dirty at times writing erotica.  My sexy, passionate side is balanced by a fairly strong religious and spiritual side as well.  To thine own self be true however.  I can’t pretend the sexy side doesn’t exist.  I have a real talent for smut also, lol.  I know ultimately I’d like to evolve into more of a mainstream fiction writer who includes some very racy scenes.  Yes, the unicorn known as porn with a plot for you cynical people, LOL.  Getting there means accepting all of me though, and seeing what that allows me to grow into.

And there you have it.  My continuing path to self-realization thus far as a would be author.

That Other Complaint

I’ve already made a few posts today.  I did say I was going to talk about that other recent Twitter notification that bothered me though.

It was one going around the erotica authors’ circle on Twitter.  It was all about how women were supposedly educating men about what horrible erotica authors they are and laughing at their “stupid” mistakes.  Not the first time I’ve seen such a post either.  During my few months on twitter, I found the erotica authors to be pretty judgmental and negative in general.  The key words there are “IN GENERAL”.  There are some wonderful, supportive and talented women (and men) there also.  I adore Ava Sterling and Aurora Blue in particular.  They’ve been helpful since the beginning.

OK, getting back to the subject, let’s be real.  There are quite a few bad male erotica authors out there.  What the ladies are NOT understanding though is that their way or view is NOT the only way.  I had a blog post about this in the past.  There was an article in The Atlantic magazine how authors had to write consent in romance novels.  The idea being essentially that if you didn’t have written and signed consent at every step of the way, you were writing and advocating rape.  Here’s that blog post:

A Minor Rant

My comments there are enough said.  Another example I saw in the past was a snarky agreement among some that if bra or genital sizes were mentioned, they immediately stopped reading and the story was trash.  “What did they do, take out a measuring tape at that point?” was one reply.   What they were missing is that some people, particularly if they”re in fields that require regular measuring and sizing such as seamstresses and tailors, clothing sales people, construction and automotive workers, and even people that do crafty type things as hobbies, tend to be able to measure very accurately by eyesight.  It’s not unrealistic at all.  Overall, I’d agree that general size descriptors and leaving things to imagination is probably a little better though.

So where do I think the issues are being seen all wrong?  The ladies are missing a chance to grow their audience.  Men DO buy and read erotica also.  I get email from men and women both on my writing.

Saying “women don’t stand in front of mirrors and compare their boobs to fruit” misses the reality that men tend to be highly visual creatures and competition / comparison driven.  They care about things like are a female character’s boobs “pear shaped” or perfectly round and firm *cough*fakeboobs*cough* (lol).  They want to know who’s boobs are bigger and by how much also.  When you understand the male mindset, you can tailor your writing just a little so that you appeal more to them as well.  Bang, your sales go up.

The whole idea of “teaching” men by belittling them is only going to backfire also.  For all their bravado, men have fragile egos, especially where women are concerned.  They’re also trained to suppress emotion early on, so they’re rarely all that intuitive, BUT they also are eager to please.

So here’s a tip, girls, both as authors and for relationships.  All you’ve got to do to get a decent guy to do what you want is ask nicely or gently suggest.  In the case of writing erotica, give them better, more natural ways to help relay visual information.  Explain to them that the act isn’t about rutting either when you’re a woman.  It’s about intimacy, emotional connection, and a primal need to feel desired, like that male character would sacrifice anything to have our heroine.  When an erotica author can impart all of those male and female perspective elements into a story, I think the sky is the limit.

Again, same holds true with relationships.  Too many women complain about men being clueless, and expect them to know exactly how to touch them, what to say to them, etc…  It takes communication.  Positive communication too.  “A little gentler (or rougher), oh yes!”, goes much farther with the typical clueless male than “not like that, you selfish idiot.”

A certain radio show host on relationships had it right; women have all the power in relationships (at least non-abusive ones).  It just has to be used in the right way.

She’s Baaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

Yes, I *FINALLY* got more of Witchfire’s story written.  Like last week, it’s a little less than I wanted, but I have a deadline to meet with DBC, and I’m also out of gas physically and creatively.

This week we did get a little smut as Ms. Americana gets in a catfight with her doppelganger from Sully’s (Comixfana’s) Earth.  Special guest appearance by Deanna Troi’s character Nancy Peye as we advance the plot and try to coordinate stories a little more.

Witchfire, Pt 10 – Training Day 2

Return of the SMUT – Not Quite

I’ve been working to at least get my Witchfire story going again.  As those following my blog know, life has been… chaotic the last few weeks though.  I’ll leave the drama at that.

Because I had a deadline to meet with DBC for hosting, and I just ran out of gas, I only got about half way through this chapter, and turned it into a short one.  No smut, but it does advance the plot and fill in some questions about the mysterious “Institute”

Witchfire, Pt 9 – Training Day (Prelude)

Enjoy, hit the like button, share, send me money…  It’s that good.  LOL  J/K

Hope everyone enjoys.  I should be fully back on track next week.

Witchfire Biography Posted

I’ve read a few books and websites on writing (odd how most of said books are written by people who never had a best seller) that have the advice to make a biography for at least the protagonist.  It’s supposed to help you keep their motivations and history straight, etc…

This is something  that I’ve done since the mid 80s when I was creating my own comic book characters.  I’ve done numerous ones now, and I believe I’m pretty darn good at it too.

So, for those who want a look at how I put together a character, I give you:

Witchfire Character Bio

I’ll let you judge for yourself, hopefully keeping in mind also that this is a character for a story line that’s one part complete smut and one part superhero drama.

 

Witchfire’s next chapter should be done in a few days also.  I’ve had ALOT going on in the ‘real’ world that’s kept me from writing.  That on top of the writer’s block I mentioned in my last post.

A Witchy Realization or Two…

I’ve been mulling over a growing uneasiness with my Witchfire story line.  It has been an uneasiness strong enough to give me writer’s block.  Tonight, I think I finally figured out what it was.

Witchfire’s stories are set in a universe created as part of a superheroine peril site; DangerBabeCentral.com.  It’s fairly tame as superheroine exploitation sites go, but I still hated the way the characters were violated repeatedly, portrayed as air-headed at times, and just accepted getting violated as a hazard of being a superhero.

Witchfire was my attempt to drop a new character into that mess like another friend, Comixfana had done previously, and create a more tolerable yet hopefully still sexy version of that world.

Early on… Like 3 paragraphs into chapter 1, I realized she was coming off as the world’s bitchiest Mary Sue though.  So instead I dialed her down, tried to make her more human, and instead ended up with her being just another victim instead.

I also subconsciously fell into a pattern of projecting my own self doubts into her.  She was younger and couldn’t get anybody to listen to her, so the story arc got stuck in a repeating loop and I had to bring in another character to do what she SHOULD have done.

Those of you who don’t know Comixfana’s character are getting introduced to him this upcoming chapter.  Part of Sully’s lessons are going to be “you could have done this yourself if you didn’t let them make you doubt yourself”.

Moving forward, my answer will be bringing the She-Legion up to Witchfire’s level instead of “dumbing” her down to the level of DBC stories.  That will require upping the bad guys’ game a little too, but that will only make the stories more exciting going forward.

I hope this makes the stories more enjoyable for everyone, and will MAYBE set a better example for those reading the DBC fan fiction page.

 

As a side note, constructive comments on this or anything I write are ALWAYS welcome.  Anything where that might not be the case will have comments turned off.  You can disagree with me freely, just do so in a polite manner.  If you do that, I will NOT block you, drop you from my followed blogs list, etc…  Polite disagreement and discussion is how we learn and grow.  I am still capable of being friends with somebody and disagreeing with them on some things also.

Needless to say, positive feedback is also extremely welcome, LOL

Conan Era Story Published

I got a handful of likes on Twitter from a snippet of a Conan era story I wrote about a year or so ago.  Because of that, I decided to publish it here.  It’s only 2/3 done at this point, so I’ll need to finish it if it gets attention.

Playing the video game Conan: Exiles inspired this story.  Fair warning before anybody reads it also; the Hyborian age of Conan was 15,000 BC in the stories.  Thinking about bloodshed, violence and such were very different in that day and age.  ONLY read this story if you’re over 18 and can read it with that in mind.  The story is meant to be darkly realistic and NOT an endorsement of such behavior.

Conan – Tyche Defends Derketo’s Temple

Beyond that, there a few paragraphs that will serve as a quick primer for the story before the actual story itself…  The same place I usually put my disclaimers.

Witchfire Pt 8 Published

I finally got this one finished.  Krystal’s nearly losing her life to Count Ivanova on Halloween has major consequences when Hexanna blows off the near defeat.  Krystal’s up and down relationship with the She-Legion goes down again, and Amazing Babe reacts poorly to discovering Krystal’s true heritage.  In the middle of everything, the Aberration decides to tear up the town also.  Can anything be salvaged, and can Krystal continue to hold everything together on her own?

Witchfire, Pt 8 – Reinforcements

Hope everyone enjoys.

My Thoughts on BDSM

Since my half dozen (thus far) non fan fiction erotica pieces all have at least a slight element of domination and submission to them (Amy’s Seduction being the only real exception), AND I’m picking up followers on Twitter into that lifestyle, I felt I’d take a couple of minutes to spell out my thoughts on the subject.

Plain and simple, my view is that as long as it’s safe, sane and above all mutually consensual, it’s all good.  All of that requires a great deal of communication and self awareness by both parties.

I have one huge gripe with elements of the community.  That being the “if you’re not doing it MY way, it’s not really domination!” crowd.  To be blunt, that’s not only utter crap, it also tells me the Dom or Domme uttering it has no idea what they’re talking about, quite likely little or no respect for submissives, and / or massive insecurity issues.  A real dominant is going to want to talk, make sure the other person is more than just titillated, and has compatible ideas about what BDSM is.  If their ideas later drift apart on the subject, they will set the submissive free instead of trying to force them past hard limits also.

I’m fairly passionate on the issue because I used to have a virtual part-time job counseling women who were responding to ads looking for submissives on a certain free site that no longer runs personals.  Horrified by some of the “dom” ads I saw I posted my own telling submissives that their submission was a gift given, it had to be earned, that a dom should listen to your wants and needs when establishing relationship boundaries, and that it was just as much about their orgasm as his.

It was amazing and scary how many “thank you” replies I got from women with strong curiosity but who were confused and scared after ‘talking’ to abusers who told them that if they were submissive at all, they’d immediately do anything and everything the “dom” said, no questions asked, right from the moment they met.  A few of them even told me they were made to feel like they were crazy until they read my post.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m anything but a saint.  I’m proud to say I saved a few women from abusive relationships though.

Witchfire Halloween RetCon Published

For those not familiar with it, RetCon is shorthand for ‘Retroactive Continuity’.  It’s a term that first came about in comic book circles.  They occur when the writers have mucked up a story so badly that they need to rewrite a chunk of existing history.  Sometimes they just happen when a writer  thinks they have a better idea to tell a story in a more modern way.  I’ll spare my opinion of most of those efforts.

Getting back on track, I had very limited information on Mister X’s character Hexanna when I wrote the first version of this story.  I tried to take some creative liberties and made her a character with a magic staff who didn’t actually believe in magic.  I thought it would be an interesting contradiction to explore.  Probably a bad idea to start with, and once I learned more about Hexanna’s character, I decided a re-write was in order.

Without getting preachy, I feel that if somebody writes fan fiction, they should keep it as true to form as possible to the work of the original author.  Ergo, I’m doing what I can to humanize and add some depth to the characters, but I do NOT want to change long established canon about them.  Nuff said. 🙂   Here’s the story:

Witchfire, Pt 7 – Halloween RetCon

As the name might suggest, the re-write also lets me fit the story more properly into the existing story line also.  Readers will have to suffer through an added sex scene too. 😉